Skip to main content

The Mysterious Handbag Organizer: Preparing for the Unknown

I’m pulling up to the stop, my eyes scanning the usual scene. Then I spot her, an elderly lady who looks like she’s about to launch the most covert mission of the century. 

She’s sitting there, hunched over with a quiet intensity, completely engrossed in the contents of her handbag. It’s like she’s unravelling the mysteries of the universe, one crumpled receipt at a time.

Her hands move with the kind of precision that you only see in people who have rehearsed their movements for years, maybe decades. It’s as though she’s performing a delicate surgery on a handbag, removing each item with such careful deliberation that you’d think she was examining ancient relics. The lipstick is the first to make an appearance. It’s placed delicately, its shiny red surface glinting in the sunlight. No rush, no hesitation. Then the tissues. Folded neatly, placed with mathematical precision, as if the tissue-to-lipstick ratio could determine the fate of the universe.

An elderly lady at a bus stop meticulously arranges the contents of her handbag: tissues, lipstick, a pillbox, receipts, and keys, each item carefully placed.

She continues her performance, unfazed by the world around her, clearly so engrossed in her work that she doesn’t even notice the chaos that’s brewing just a few feet away. Receipts, hand sanitiser, an old bus ticket, each item finds its place in an invisible order known only to her. It’s a ritual, a sacred practice, the like of which I’ve never seen before. It could very well be the prelude to some intergalactic journey, or perhaps the preparation for the day’s greatest crisis, a royal visit, maybe? Or the sudden need to fend off a hoard of the undead?

As I watch, I feel an odd sense of awe. This isn’t just handbag organisation. No, no. This is a carefully crafted dance, a precise, planned choreography that she’s performing in full view of anyone lucky (or unlucky) enough to witness it. The bag becomes her stage, the items become her dancers, and the onlookers? Mere props in her grand, secret show.

She doesn’t rush, doesn’t fumble. Everything’s placed exactly where it should be. It’s like watching a maestro conduct an invisible orchestra, the kind where the instruments are tubes of lipstick and scrunched-up receipts. She aligns each item with such focus that I’m half-tempted to applaud, though I’m not sure what for. Her complete absorption is unsettling, yet strangely hypnotic.

And then, finally, the moment comes. The bus pulls up. She stops, examines the masterpiece she’s created, and without a word, scoops everything back into her bag. Her work is done, as though the whole process was merely a warm-up for something greater. Perhaps she's not just getting ready for the bus ride. No, this was the prelude to something far more significant. An apocalypse-preparedness drill? A spy mission for MI6? Maybe she’s been hired by the government to carry out a top-secret operation that requires her to have tissues, hand sanitiser, and lipstick at the ready.

I’ll never know. I just have to marvel at how seamlessly she’s prepared herself for a world that, for most of us, is unprepared for the chaos ahead.

And as she steps on the bus, I can’t help but wonder: Does she know something we don’t?

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The Rolling Chronicles: Life, Lanes, and Lessons from the Driver’s Seat

As a city bus driver, I'm not just steering through traffic, I'm navigating a sea of stories, personalities, and unexpected moments. From heartfelt conversations to the chaos of the commute, every ride is an unscripted adventure. So, join me behind the wheel as we dive into the life and lanes of public transport, where every journey has a tale to tell. Navigating the City Through Stories: The Bus Driver’s Perspective on Life and Lanes Public transit isn’t just about getting from point A to B, it’s a living, breathing network of people, stories, and unexpected moments. This blog is where bus drivers, transport pros, and curious passengers come together, sharing experiences from behind the wheel and beyond. As a city bus driver, I’m more than just a navigator, I’m a storyteller, a streetwise sage, and sometimes even an impromptu therapist. Every shift is an unscripted adventure, filled with colourful characters, urban rhythms, and the occasional bit of chaos. From late-night conf...

Route Learning Log: Service 21 – Clovenstone to Royal Infirmary

I’ve never driven the 21, but I already know its rhythm: the sharp inhale before a narrow turn, the lull of wide suburban streets, the murmur of students crossing in Sighthill, and the quiet expectation of reaching the Royal Infirmary.  Today, it exists only in my notebook, in imagined brake lights and familiar smells of the city, as I try to memorise six sections of Edinburgh one careful corner at a time. Clovenstone to Sighthill – The Estate Escape Clovenstone’s your starting pistol, low-rise flats, stairwells, and the sound of doors shutting just as you pull up. Wester Hailes Park and Hailesland Place blend into each other with that west Edinburgh rhythm: plenty of crossing points, kids darting across the grass shortcuts, and the odd shopping trolley that’s somehow migrated half a mile from the supermarket. Murrayburn Park brings more of the same before Westside Plaza appears, part shopping centre, part social hub, part clock you can set your watch by. From there, Calder Drive s...

Homework Run: Scouting Service 4 from Queen Margaret University to Snowsports Centre

From coastline breezes to hilltop views, I’m plotting the perfect route, before I’ve even touched the steering wheel. Crossing Edinburgh without leaving my chair: A homework journey on Service 4. A desk-chair journey across Edinburgh, from campus calm to Pentland peaks, undertaken with nothing but a stop list, an overactive imagination, and the faint hope that the live version won’t involve too much swearing. Section 1: The Academic Warm-Up We start at Queen Margaret University, a place where the roads are wide, the air is fresh, and the biggest hazard is probably a student wandering out mid-scroll on their phone. From Queen Margaret Drive to Milton Link, it’s all fairly civilised, the sort of stretch where you think, I could do this all day. Then comes Corbiewynd and Parrotshot. According to Street View, these are perfectly normal residential turns. But I’ve driven enough “normal” turns to know they can become “hold-my-coffee” moments once real-life Edinburgh drivers get involved. By ...